Helpless
by SakurAnoShirO
Summary: With the loss of her telempathy, Emma's feeling of helplessness destroy's her life...
1. Helpless

"How do you feel?" Adam asked, helping me sit up from a cold steel bed in the lab.  
"Empty," I managed to whisper. Adam didn't seem satisfied so I added, "cold."  
"I'll get you a blanket," Shalimar offered before the other two could. They all stood in the doorway, ready to get me anything I wanted. They would have brought me the crown jewels if I had asked.  
Shalimar still had the sense to look for Adam's approval before leaving. He nodded slightly and she disappeared behind Brennan and Jesse.  
My gaze was transfixed on a cabinet near the floor. It was almost unbearable to be near my friends. They seemed so distant and removed even though they were at the door. Brennan was watching me closely, but I didn't know what he was thinking. Jesse was trying to look anywhere but at me, which led him to stare at his feet. Proxy Blue was saying something in another room. I couldn't make out the words, but I knew what it was about. The big explosion at the harbor, caused by an electrical fire colliding with an oil barrel. Brennan caused the electrical fire, but Proxy would never know.  
I closed my eyes and tried to clear my mind. It was too hard.  
"Emma?" Adam asked, trying to get me to focus. "Emma."  
I opened my eyes and found myself looking straight into his. Yesterday I would have known what he was feeling and what I should say and do, but his eyes weren't the window to his soul anymore. They were the same, I wasn't.  
"Emma, do you think you could find the agent who did this if I gave you some pictures?" he asked.  
"Maybe," I whispered, not daring to actually talk. It didn't seem safe yet.  
He looked over to Brennan and nodded. He disappeared, leaving Jesse alone. He looked like he desperately wanted to put his arms around me and hold me until I felt better, but he knew it wouldn't.  
Shalimar came back with the afgan off of my bed and wrapped it around me, then backed off.  
"Do you want to rest?" Adam asked. I didn't answer. Adam motioned for Jesse to come. He carefully picked me up like I had some bone that was healing, and took me to my room. I fell asleep in his arms.  
  
"You can't escape, the building is surrounded, Ms. deLauro. I suggest you come out peacefully, or else I'll have to do something durastic."  
The GS agent sounded like she was reading a speech the way she talked. I smiled secretively, forming a plan in her mind. The nearest agent was within striking distance. The barrels of oil I was behind would create a good barrier.  
  
"Emma! Emma wake up," Shalimar shouted. I suddenly jumped and sat up, wide awake.  
"What happened?" I asked.  
"It was just a nightmare," Shalimar said soothingly. "It's okay, you're safe."  
I crumpled onto Shalimar, who held me while I cried.  
  
Brennan Mulwray pulled out a machete he had gotten two years ago as a present. It had a beaded leather cover that was stuffed into a corner of his dresser, but the machete always was behind his bed, just in case.  
Now he held it in his hands, tossing it lightly up and down carefully. The blade was sharp still and it didn't have any rust yet. Brennan pricked his finger, but no blood ran out.  
"Tough skin," he mused quietly.  
"Of course it is," I said in the doorway.  
"What?" Brennan asked, coming out of his thoughts.  
"Why do you have a machete?" I asked. Brennan smiled like he was reliving a memory from his past, then looked back up at me and answered.  
"Protection," he said. "Do you want to come in?"  
I hadn't really expected him to want to spend time with me, but I accepted and sat on his bed.  
He placed the machete next to me. "I did this job for a guy once a long time ago. After I was done, I went to his apartment to get paid, but he said he lost all his money to a bet he made. I was about to," Brennan paused in thought for a second. "He ended up paying me with that."  
"Oh," was all I could think to say.  
He stuck his hand behind his bed again and searched around for something.  
"You should just pull the bed out," I told him.  
"I could, but I'm only cleaning so that I don't have to clean for Adam, so-"  
"You want to waste time," I finished with him. Suddenly, I felt cold again. Before I made Brennan worried, I ran out of the room and into my own.  
I sank to the ground safely behind my door. It wasn't that it was cold, but it was inside my head, making every thought seem distant and detached. I started to shiver, more and more until my whole body shook. I realized I couldn't control it.  
"Adam," I managed to whisper into my comm. ring before I lost consiousness.  
  
The nearest agent turned around, gun pointed down, but not at me. He didn't see me yet. The head agent kept shouting threats at me, like the thought of stasis would lure me out so they could take me down. Eckhart grows them stupid.  
"I know you're in here, deLauro. Just come out and I'll ask Eckhart to take it easy on you. Maybe."  
I knew I needed to save all my strength for the battle that was coming up, so someone close by would have to get my psyonic attack. The agent with the gun was withing two yards and I focused in on him. I let go of myself and entered his mind.  
"Sorry, Emma," he said. Suddenly, a giant weight crashed down on me. I knew.  
My powers were gone.  
  
"We're loosing her," I heard Adam say above me. "We need to get her fever down."  
"Could we-" Whoever was talking was too far away to be made out. I tried to reach out with my mind, but there was nothing to grasp onto. The truth hit me again. I was all alone forever.  
"We could put her into stasis," Shalimar said. I could almost feel the tension of the room go up. Almost.  
"No," Brennan said forcefully. "She wouldn't want that."  
I tried to tell them that I was alright, or would be okay and that they didn't have to worry, but I couldn't. I couldn't find the strength. Before I could have easily tapped into Shalimar's inner strength and drawn it from her. My weaknesses crept into my mind. If I couldn't even get out of bed, there was no way I could ever fight the GSA. And I had no more powers. I was vunerable to any type of attack, mental or physical. Completely helpless.  
No use to Mutant X.  
"Look," I heard. There were footsteps coming in my direction, but they stopped a few yards away. I guessed they were gathered around the computer.  
"I don't get it. shouldn't she be awake?"  
"Maybe she can't open her eyes," Shal suggested. She walked over to me. "Em, can you hear me?"  
I don't know if I could answer, but I didn't.  
  
Helpless. That should be my new codename. I sullenly watched as Brennan and Shalimar fought through the glass window of the infirmary. Adam had finally figured out how I lost my powers and he was working on a way to get them back, but I knew he was just doing it so I wouldn't get to discouraged.  
There was no way to get my powers back. They were gone for good, just like the life I had once led. There was no point trying to hide the fact that I could never be part of Mutant X again.  
I wanted desperately to go back to my room, but I wasn't sure if I could make it. If I went through the east exit or the infirmary, I could go down that hall past Brennan, Jesse and Adam's rooms, then down another hall to Shalimar and my rooms. If I was lucky, I could get to Brennan's.  
I gathered all my strength and started down the hall. Looking into Brennan's bedroom, I saw the machete on the bed. Besides the blade, it looked inviting. I walked in and lied down.  
I can't even make it to my bedroom, I thought to myself. I really am helpless.  
I fingered the blade.  
What life do I have besides Mutant X? I thought. I'm a New Mutant, or was at least. I could try to live on the outside world.  
Who was I trying to fool but myself. I would never get over loosing my powers.  
I took the blade out of it's sheath and brought it up to my neck.  
"This is the right thing to do," I said quietly. "No more telempathy, no more Emma."  
I heard footsteps in the hall, but I didn't care anymore.  
"Bren- Emma!" Jesse shouted, running in. Before I could push it into my neck, he was holding firmly onto my hand and bringing the machete away from me. "What are you doing?!"  
"What did it look like?" I asked cynically.  
He wrapped his arms around me and hugged me for what seemed like hours. He wouldn't let go, but I didn't fight him.  
"Emma," he finally said, drawing back. "Why. why would you do that?"  
"It's the only way," I answered.  
Jesse looked into my eyes, trying to figure me out. I was young, smart, and rid of my powers that held me back. Why was I killing myself?  
"Because I don't know what your feeling and I never will," I said, answering my unspoken question.  
"Is that all?" he asked, mildly surprised.  
"All?" I asked. "My whole life has been based on what my powers can get me. Jobs, success, selling pants, I could do it. But without my powers, what do I have?"  
"Friends," he answered simply.  
"No I don't," I told him, trying to get him to understand. "I'm worthless, helpless, weak. I can't fight anymore. I can't stay in Mutant X. I have to leave."  
"No you don't-"  
"Yes I do!" I shouted. "I can't stay anymore! I need to leave, then you'll replace me. You'll find someone who can walk to her room without almost fainting and be able to feel your emotions. Jesse, I don't know you anymore. I'm cut off. I don't know what you're feeling!"  
"This is how I'm feeling," he said, pulling me into a tender kiss.  
"I pour out my heart and soul, and all you're thinking about is kissing me," I said.  
"Well you wanted to know."  
I looked into his eyes. He was nervous, excited, scared, worried. "I don't know how I know, but I do," I whispered.  
"Just because you're not telempathic anymore doesn't mean you're not empathic. You lost you powers, but you still care about people," he told me.  
I let the tears flow. "What am I going to do, Jess?" I asked him. He held me again.  
"You're going to stay here, alive. And we're going to take care of you until you get through this. And when you do, then you can start fighting the GSA."  
I didn't argue with him. Instead I kissed him slowly.  
  
I examined myself in the mirror. My dress hung lightly on my shoulders. Inside the gardens, a small arch had been set up. I don't think any of us were surprised when Adam told us he could perform the ceremony. Adam can do it all.  
Shalimar walked in, holding a picture of the GS agent who was closest to me.  
"You didn't forget about him, did you?"  
"He took my powers," I said. "I can't forget that."  
"Then why aren't you dreaming about him?" she asked.  
"Because I'm dreaming about Jesse," I answered.  
  
one year later  
"Emma," Jesse whispered, lightly brushing the hair out of my eyes. "Em, wake up."  
I contentedly smiled, and stretched out. The man lying next to me, smiled too and kissed my forehead.  
I couldn't know for sure what he was thinking, but I had the feeling it was something big. I got up and put my robe on.  
"Emma," Jesse said from behind me. I turned around, happiness filling me. "Love of my life, will you marry me?" 


	2. Weak

Jesse's face fell when I stared blankly at him. My lips were curved into a half smile, reflecting my joy and concern. He tried to look into my eyes and read my emotions, but I had been a telempath far to long to be as easily read as that.  
  
We stayed like that for a long time, him on the ground holding out a ring to me, standing up, our eyes locked, his daring mine to open up.  
  
"Why not?" he asked, dropping his hands and standing up so we were level. It was so characteristic of him to analyze everything and then try to fix it.  
  
I stared at him a long time. He looked hurt, but for the moment he had put his hurt aside to quench his insatiable curiosity. I offered him a weak smile which didn't reassure him.   
  
"It's not you," I stammered, not knowing what was wrong with me.  
  
"It's not about what happened last year, is it?" he asked.  
  
"I don't know," I told him. He looked into my shielded eyes and put the velvet cased ring in his pocket. Then he placed his hands securely on my hips.  
  
A small tear slid down my cheek. What was wrong with me? Here was a great guy who I loved more than my life ready to marry me and I couldn't make myself accept his proposal. And I had no idea why. All I did know was that I loved being held by him and feeling the security he gave me which I used to get from my powers, but I always had the feeling that I could get closer and more intimate with him. There was always something unknown stopping me.  
  
I reached up and brushed my tear off my cheek, but instead of putting my hand back down, I reached up and touched his face tenderly with my wet fingers. His skin and my skin, it felt so good, and I closed my eyes, giving into my feelings. I moved my fingers across his cheek and ran them through his hair. I was so close, yet so far from him.  
  
"Don't worry about my love," I whispered to him. "I still love-"  
  
Abruptly my hand jerked hitting his head, and instinctively he snapped his head back.   
  
"Did you just hit me?" he asked, stunned. My eyes weren't open yet, but I could feel his stare on me. I heard him gasp.  
  
My hand, my arm was trembling. I could feel the sensation rise from my fingertips and run like a great wave down my arm. With a great jolt, my chest convulsed and suddenly, my whole body was shaking. I collapsed into Jesse's body and I felt his strong arms pull around me, keeping me upright even though I knew my legs were shaking too much to support me.  
  
"Adam I think Emma's having a seizure!" Jesse shouted into his comm.-ring. "What should I do?"  
  
"Can you bring her to the lab?" Adam asked urgently, but with his calm voice trying to keep Jesse from panicking.  
  
"I can try." My eyes still closed, I felt Jesse reach an arm under my knees and hoist me up. But I was shaking too hard and Jesse was too unsteady. Before he fell he half threw and half placed me onto our bed.  
  
"What's going on?" Brennan asked, running in. I guess he heard the shouting from his room.  
  
"I don't know," Jesse shouted panicked and scared. "She's shaking too badly and I can't get her to the lab."  
  
"Let me try," Brennan said, running to me. I felt his arms around me and I was lifted up. I felt like I had no control and no strength, but opened my eyes to see Brennan's face. He was running me as fast as he could without dropping me to Adam's lab, I assumed. He looked so scared and worried. I hardly ever saw him like that.  
  
I faded into unconsciousness, but was brought back by my sudden drop onto a cold metal table. People were shouting around me, but their voices were blurred. I stared up at the ceiling in shock. What was happening to me? Was I going to die? I was going to get married to Jesse- I couldn't die yet! My mind raced.   
  
Adam finally appeared over me and held my arm down while he tried as painlessly as possible to slide a needle into my arm. But my muscles were drawn so tight I felt as though I had been stabbed. The burning at the entry point quickly spread throughout my whole body and I felt like I was on fire. I clenched my fists in pain, determined not to cry out.   
  
Finally, like a cold release, I shuddered and my body relaxed. I had never felt so good. Blessed cold.  
  
"Are you okay?" Jesse asked, stroking my hair back from my sweat soaked face.   
  
"I've felt better," I mumbled. Adam had put me in soft restraints so that I wouldn't fall off the bed and I weakly struggled against them. Jesse lovingly held my hand while carefully taking them off.  
  
  
  
Shalimar joined Jesse above me. "Hey Em," was all she could think of to say. I loved her for it; she made me feel like were were picking up a conversation at breakfast or something, not waiting for Adam's sure-to-be grim report.  
  
  
  
I closed my eyes to blink, but I was so tired, I couldn't lift them back up all the way.  
  
  
  
"I love you," Jesse whispered to me, then he kissed me on the forehead. It was the last thing I heard before I drifted off to sleep. 


	3. End

Author's notes: I meant for this story to be a story and a sequel, and it is everywhere else but here. The first chapter is called Helpless, the second and third Holy Matromony. Sorry for the confusion! Oh yeah, and I really would love more feedback- it's really great to know what you all think! so please r&r!  
  
~nalaniangel (www.geocities.com/welcometomutantx/home.html)  
  
___  
  
"Weak!"  
  
"Monster!"  
  
"Useless!"  
  
"Idiot!"  
  
Insults like that weren't usually thrown around on the street… I turned to see who had said it. The busy street corner I found myself on was lined with people shouting at me, but I could only hear four voices clearly. A female shouted "Weak!" again and I desperately spun around. To my horror, every person lining the streets to my left was Shalimar and they were all shouting at me.  
  
"Monster!" I turned again to see a thousand Brennan's standing on the sidewalks, pumping their fists.  
  
Before I heard "Scum!" I turned 90 degrees again and what I thought I would see was true. Adam's were not only on the sidewalks, but in the streets, blocking off the traffic. I could see cars and vans trying to get through.  
  
That leaves only one person…  
  
I turned once more and my heart hit the floor. There was only one person on the final street, standing right in the middle.  
  
Jesse. The one I loved.  
  
He opened his mouth and began to shout. "Idiot! Idiot!"  
  
My eyes flew open into darkness. Sounds of my breathing filled the silence in the room and I wondered where I was. As my breathing calmed, I began to realize that I wasn't alone in the room. Someone else was sitting next to me. I blinked my eyes a few times to get adjusted to the light and looked over. It was Jesse.  
  
___  
  
"Ahh!" I screamed, jumping. Jesse jumped too and instinctually massed, ready to protect me. I sat up, chest heaving. As soon as he realized there was no trouble, he went normal again and went to me. I touched me on the arm and I screamed again, soaring off of the bed. I backed up until I hit a corner and stood backed up to it for a long while.  
  
Jesse stood in front of me next to my bed. I had been sleeping in the medical lab. There was a chair next to my bed with a blanket and I realized Jesse had been sleeping next to me.  
  
We stood facing each other until my pounding head could take it no longer. I sunk to the ground and hugged my knees, resting my head on them. Slowly Jesse walked over to me. Step by step with all his muscles tensed, ready to respond to anything I might throw at him. Ironically, a year ago, there was no defense that could have stopped me and every offense I could stop. Now I was completely vulnerable to anything. Not that I had been sitting on my ass, though. Although I was nowhere near as good as anybody else yet, for the past year I had been learning martial arts from Shalimar.   
  
Shalimar…   
  
"Weak!"   
  
My headache exploded and I buried my head in my hands, pressing my temples, trying furtively to stop the pain.  
  
"Emma, what's wrong?" Jesse said, rushing to me. He crouched down and tried to touch my face, but I doubled over in pain, holding my head tightly. Fearing he had caused it with his touch, he pulled away but stayed just as close.  
  
The images that had come with my vivid dream, but faded as I had regained consciousness, now played themselves over in my mind. As clearly as I could hear Jesse's concerned voice I could hear him shouting "Idiot!" at me. I opened my eyes and looked at him.  
  
"Do you think I'm an idiot?" I asked through the blinding pain.  
  
"No!" he shouted, hovering next to me. "I would never think that."  
  
"That's what I thought," I whispered. But I could still hear the single voice shouting it in my mind with such conviction that I could believe it. I closed my eyes again so that I could concentrate on blocking it out.  
  
Jesse tried again to reach me and placed his hand on my leg. It made me open my eyes and I looked straight into his own. They were the same chilling eyes in my dream.  
  
I screamed and jumped up, still holding my head and covering my ears, desperately trying to block it all out. But the voices and the images just got stronger.  
  
"Adam, Brennan, Shalimar, she's awake and she's freaking out. I don't know what to do," Jesse said, through their comm.-rings.  
  
It was a few seconds until someone responded. "Ok," Adam said, groggily. He had just woken up. "I'll be right there."  
  
"We're coming too," Shalimar added.  
  
"We?" Jesse asked. "Are you two together right now?"  
  
Neither Shalimar or Brennan responded. If I hadn't been writhing in pain, Jesse probably would have cracked a joke about them being in the throws of love. I doubted they had been, but I had more pressing matters on my mind.  
  
I leaned against the wall in my own private hell. Those words.. weak, monster, useless, idiot… I had heard them all before, but coming from the friends I considered family, they carried a different meaning. And the fact that it had been a dream, but I could still see and hear it scared me deeply. It replayed in my mind until I began to hear them chant louder and louder. The words exploded in my ears and I screamed to try and cover them.  
  
"Stop it!" I shouted, crying and begging for it to stop.  
  
"Emma!" My hands were pulled from my face and were slammed against the wall, being held there by the wrists. All of the voices fled and my name echoed in the void left by them. My eyes flew open and I was face to face with Adam. I breathed a sigh of relief and my feelings over took me. I began to shudder with tears. Adam looked lost and gently let my sore wrists go. Shalimar replaced him and wrapped her arms around me. I crumpled onto her and let my tears flow.  
  
___  
  
I walked into a room I had nearly forgotten, a room where I had spent many hours meditating before I lost my powers. It felt so good just to let go and live in emotions. It was such a relief from spending so much time with Shalimar, Jesse, and Brennan, walking balls of stress. Sometimes they were wound so tight I thought their heads would pop off.  
  
The platform was on top of a beautiful water bottom. The light bounced and moved off of the walls and pillars. It was so relaxing. And it was the perfect place to think about my dream.  
  
"Weak!"  
  
I heard the word crystal clear like it had come from Shalimar's mouth. But it only echoed once in my mind. Somehow, I was able to control that. I could analyze dreams pretty well, but I had a feeling that this wasn't an ordinary dream. For some reason, I knew I should take it as face value, that my subconscious was acting out exactly what it thought.  
  
But did I think that Shalimar thought I was weak? I had been called weak by the GSA plenty of times because I was a New Mutant. What if I thought Shalimar thought I was weak because I wasn't a New Mutant anymore? But that was crazy, since I knew she had friends who were regular humans. And I knew she didn't think that of me.  
  
And Brennan. He had called me a monster. Did it have anything to do with the fact that I had tried to kill myself using his knife? Or the fact that I had tried to kill myself at all? Analyzing this dream wasn't working out. Nothing was making sense.  
  
I moved onto Adam. "Useless!" I shuddered in remembrance. I could understand this one. I had had serious fears that I was going to be useless to the team after I lost my powers and I thought that Adam would kick me out for sure. It made sense. But I had stopped thinking that after a year of living at Sanctuary powerless. I knew I was still important to the team even if I couldn't fight. Maybe it didn't make sense. My head swam. I took a deep breath to try and center myself again as I moved onto the hardest part of the dream.  
  
Jesse's eyes still pierced me as the word "Idiot" left his lips. Did he think I was stupid for trying to commit suicide?   
  
Maybe the seizure had caused the strange dream and it's after-effects. Sourly, I thought that if I could have drawn on Shalimar's inner strength to help me through it, the dream might not have happened.  
  
Shalimar's inner strength…  
  
My mind began to race harder as a new realization hit me. What if each of my friends in the dream represented their strongest characteristic and not themselves?  
  
It all became clear. The dream was trying to tell my why I couldn't say yes to Jesse's proposal!  
  
Shalimar's strength was her strongest characteristic and she had called me weak. She was trying to tell me about my present state. I wasn't mentally strong enough to take anything on.   
  
Brennan's loyalty was his best quality and he had called me a monster because I had tried to kill myself. I still felt guilty for trying to abandon my friends via suicide after I thought I was useless. My past.  
  
Adam wasn't a new mutant, but he still helped the team. He had called me useless. I had thought that I couldn't do anything because I wasn't a telempath anymore, but Adam was the leader of Mutant X. If I wanted to, I really could do anything with my future.  
  
And Jesse. He was the embodiment of love for me. And he had called me an idiot and I knew why. It was because he loved me enough to try and help me and I had pushed him away.  
  
I couldn't say yes because I had to much holding me back.  
  
Did I love him? Truly? My heart already knew the answer. Then what was stopping me?   
  
My present state, with all my weaknesses.   
  
My past, with my suicide attempt and my guilt with trying to leave my friends.  
  
My future, with the uncertainty of gaining a new role on Mutant X as a non-New Mutant.  
  
But then there was Jesse, who loved me knowing all of this already. He loved me enough to accept me forever and seal our love in marriage.  
  
I opened my eyes and breathed deeply, coming out of my deep trance. A smile slowly spread across my face as I reflected on my perfectly analyzed dream. Shalimar represented my present, Brennan, my past, Adam, my future, and Jesse, the one man that I could share it all with.  
  
So that left only one more question. Why was my dream so vivid?  
  
"Emma."  
  
I looked around the room for anyone, but it was empty. Suddenly I realized it was my comm.-ring.  
  
"Emma."  
  
"Yes?" I answered. It was Adam.  
  
"I have some answers for you. Can you come to the medical lab?" he asked.  
  
"Of course," I told him, immediately getting up.  
  
I walked quickly to the lab, hoping he could answer my questions. I walked through the doors. To my surprise, the entire team was there.  
  
Adam must have seen my shock because he asked, "Do you want them to leave?"  
  
"No," I told him. I went up to Shalimar and hugged her. "Thanks," I whispered into her ear. She had no idea what it was for, but she hugged me back. I moved onto Brennan, who rose slightly out of his chair to hug me. "You too," I said. He was too confused to say anything. Finally I came to Jesse. "I love you," I told him. I went to hug him but he pulled me into a full embrace, kissing me passionately.  
  
Adam cleared his throat and we reluctantly pulled away from each other. In a small act of defiance, I sat on Jesse's lap, curled up on him. Shalimar tried to hide her smile, but Brennan laughed out loud and Adam's obvious embarrassment and disapproval.  
  
"I have some big news for you, Emma," he said. "I ran some tests while you were unconscious to find the cause of your seizure and I found something else." He paused, gearing up for a big medical speech. "When you lost your powers last year, you lost them because you got into the mind of another psyonic who sent your attack back in kind of a feedback loop. The attack damaged it's origin, the part of your brain that controls your telempathy."  
  
We all nodded, surprised that we were all following so far.   
  
"You've all heard about people with brain damage that affected, say, their ability to walk or speak, right? Well in those cases, eventually with work, the brain finds ways around the damage. I think that that is what is happening to you, Emma."  
  
"But I haven't worked at it," I argued. "I thought my telempathy was gone. I haven't spent any time trying to get it back."  
  
"Well we all have empathy and we all spend a lot of time trying to help each other with their emotions, being concerned for one another, talking about it and so on. That could have worked as a type of therapy for your mind. I believe you had your seizure when it tried to suddenly reassert itself. I understand it did begin when Jesse proposed, a highly emotional time."  
  
Nobody said a word.  
  
"Are you saying my telempathy is coming back?" I asked slowly.  
  
"Your dream was more real, wasn't it?"  
  
My lips curved into a smile and Adam walked forward to hug me. "Congratulations, Emma."  
  
I hugged the man I considered my father back. "You're so smart," was all I could think of to say. Adam laughed.  
  
"I'm just glad it all worked out."  
  
"It would have worked out anyway," I told him. "Even if I didn't get my telempathy back."  
  
Adam couldn't have fully appreciated what I meant, but even with partial knowledge it was enough reason to hug me again, then step out of the way for Jesse. As Adam left, I found myself directly in front of Jesse, who was on one knee, holding out the ring.  
  
"You know I love you more than anything and that I'll stay with you no matter what happens. Will you marry me, Emma deLauro?"  
  
I could only think of one word and, this time, nothing was holding me back.  
  
I wiped away a tear as I looked into the eyes of the man I loved and whispered "Yes."  
  
___  
  
My dress hung lightly off my shoulders as I inspected myself another time in the mirror. My red hair was curled slightly and my green eyes glistened against the white of my wedding dress.  
  
I sighed. Could it get any more perfect? I could feel Jesse's love so strongly, even though I was far away from him, in my room. He was waiting nervously in the main part of the Sanctuary. I could feel every emotion he was experiencing while he waited for me to appear. I loved knowing what he was feeling, but if I looked deep inside myself, I knew that I would have been okay if couldn't.  
  
Adam arrived at my door in a tuxedo and held out his arm. I slipped mine in his and we stood in the hallway. He was going to give me away.  
  
"I'm so proud of you," he told me as we stopped before we rounded the corner into the gardens. It was just me and Adam there. I had no bridesmaids. It would have been pointless because if Shalimar had been in my maid of honor and Brennan had been Jesse's best man, only Adam would have been in the audience. I heard the click of a tape and the wedding march began to play. Adam and I began to walk down the aisle.   
  
When I saw Jesse my heart stopped.  
  
A minister Adam hired began to read the well worn vows that had sealed love eternally for hundreds of years. Jesse held my hands tightly in his and listened to the minister distractedly, for he was looking into my eyes with such longing that I knew I could easily spend the rest of my life just gazing back at him.  
  
"What did I do to deserve you?" he mouthed to me.  
  
"Nothing," I mouthed back. "Because I spent my whole life trying to deserve you."  
  
"I love you," Jesse whispered to me.  
  
"I love you, too," I whispered back. With more restraint that I thought possible, we held on until the minister said we could kiss.  
  
And we came together, like we were kissing for the first time. And as our lips touched, our lives were promised to eachother, in holy matrimony, to share our love forever and ever. 


End file.
